The movie you recommend me(ek ladki) is on Netflix and I love it. What do you think? I don’t know anything about the culture so I don’t want to like something and somehow is bad. The opening is precious

I’m glad you liked it! Okay, so part of me wants to say, if you liked something, you can still like it however it gets things wrong or makes decisions people don’t like, and I do think that, but it’s also very kind of you to check in and make sure that it’s not mean or harmful. And it’s fine. Great, even, I know there are local critics who think it didn’t do enough, but that’s something else. It got a lot of things very particularly right for the story it was telling.

And…same anon?:

Sweety is so beatiful. Is she a big name in India?

Sonam Kapoor is gorgeous and yes, actually, she is huge in India. Partly because she’s her famous father’s daughter, but she is just that good-looking and a bit of a fashion icon herself, so is one of the highest paid actresses in Bollywood.

That movie is so funny. Is like a fuck you heteronormative.

Haha, it is. In a rather unusual way, setting up that first half and then flipping everything.

Men need to be more like Sahil.

In the first half, he was a well-written character, not perfect, not mean, but he had his crush and was focused on that, but I really like how when Sweety actually told him everything, this was his first reaction:

The whole situation was reframed for him completely, there was no wistfulness or “if only things had been different” and “are you sure…?”, just plain, oh, got it, so how can I help you, friend? Again, as with the complaints about how the movie could have focused more on the LGBT, I can understand the complaints about why is this guy getting so much play, why is he getting to be the hero, but it’s very much a story about setting up role models, how to behave in this situation, as allies, as family. And we can’t say it’s not needed for that audience as well.

THANK U FOR TELLING ME ELKDTAL WAS ON NETFLIX!!!! I had no idea but I’ve been wanting to see this!! Immediately went to go watch it and I loved it! I lost it at the part w the glass boxes. I’ve seen some meta on the movie so I went in with a tiny bit of the background/knowledge that the focus was on the guys, but I loved the movie! I’m gonna have to read more meta to see anything I missed in my 1st view. (1/2)

Also I knew it was a lesbian love story but somehow still missed who the girl she loved was til it was revealed/ the story was reframed! Goes to show how heteronormative everything is until we look back differently/know full story. PS sorry if this is a dumb q but I was curious, is it typical not to have any kissing shown in Bollywood movies? Wasn’t sure if that was Bc f/f kisses would be censored or if there’s generally no kisses, the hugging was scandalous in the plot but I wasn’t sure 2/2

No problem! My friend told me and I immediately downloaded it. Honestly, I’m going to have to rewatch the whole thing a few times, there was so much going on. The latter half especially, layers upon layers.

Heh, yeah, we watched the trailers wondering who it was gonna be for so long, but I think it was hinted very strongly in just the last weeks leading up to the release that it’d be Regina Cassandra’s character.

Actually, it’s not really that common to have kissing in Bollywood movies, although there’s been more recently so definitely a choice was made here. But the absence of that didn’t stand out to me.

And another anon:

I loved ELKDTAL! Glad you’re into it too 🙂

Aw, thanks, and glad you enjoyed it too! Here’s to many more.

Help me boo, I was already left for dead by all the juliantina loving and I just saw elkdtal, now I’ve ascended. I know ppl criticize the film for having less focus on the f/f pair but I know now why. They did not want all the lesbians to simultaneously combust watching Regina making eyes with Sonam. My god Regina is so stunning in this. Sonam is good too, but Regina owns me. There’s just something abt seeing this desi woman in a wlw relationship. This movie made me smile throughout their scenes

And other anons:

Girl you have to watch ek ladki if you can. It’s sooo good! Like to watch an entire movie revolving around a desi girl being gay and on top of that being so well done – all the feelings <3

OMG, have you seen Ek ladki ko dekha?! I’m so happy, this is such a big step forward and I’m freaking out. There wasn’t much wlw content and the story was told a little differently but its purpose was prolly to open people’s minds more and it rocked. I’m so happy rn. The scenes that the two had together were like super cute and both ladies are so stunning ?

I did watch it! And I loved it! 

I thought I’d be disappointed, the comments when it first came out seemed to indicate that they’d sidelined the romance, sidelined it in a way that…minimized it? And that seemed far too easy to do and I went in expecting that, but that’s not really at all what it was?

It sucks that pretty muc hevery comment about loving it has to come with a caveat, “I know there wasn’t much of the f/f”. I say it too, but we’re having to almost apologize for liking it and like, warning people. When really, I think it did exactly what it set out to do, and really well. It was a warm family movie with a major f/f plot!

Like I said, I’d come in expecting to be disappointed but gosh, seeing them talking about something actually canon LGBT, the main plot, and it not being us reading into the subtext, that just floored me. If you know what I like, it’s good intentions and execution, and I really felt that here. So many little things jumped out to me. 

The layers of meta, lol, us watching an audience watching a father and daughter played by a father and daughter. Anil and Sonam have been approached for a team-up so often but this is the one they chose to use their big first one for. The two secondary plots of the father liking to cook but it being frowned on as a woman’s job and the “forbidden” aspect of an inter-religious marriage, where the audience could draw the connections between these two things they’d already processed as being minor and not a big deal and same-sex marriages, how Rajkummar’s character immediately backed away from anything romantic once he knew what was going on, how they let the father be the loving character and the horrible brother wield most of the homophobia, how it wasn’t her apologizing to them but in the end came down to how trapped and sad a life she’d lived because of this, how acceptance came down to being a matter of familial love. 

Lol, the Regina anon. I LOVED those scenes? I immediately clipped them from a terrible bootleg and translated and shared them with a friend so we could scream over them. Kuhu looking at Sweety and so quickly picking up on the gay? 

Also, I liked how specifically desi this was, how for so many of us, being closeted means retreating to this quiet, well-behaved role, acknowledging what our choices mean and simply living with it. Coming out and losing family does not tend to be our way of handling things. I’ve seen criticism for how withdrawn or difficult to read Sweety was, but really, that is how it often is, isn’t it? I’d think you’d have to be a kind of subpar movie critic for not picking up what she’s feeling, if anything.

While I and everyone else would have loved a female version of the title song, I still loved that whole little romantic montage for them. And I SWOONED at the hand kiss. Hand kissES. 

Yeah, yeah, in comparison to other media this might not be much, but for the context, for this. It was…a lot. It’s so undeniable.There was no way to interpret this as something not between lovers.

Ultimately, I came away from it feeling really good and really moved. I thought it was effectively paced, balanced a whoooole of things really well, and it just had heart and warmth.

I’m sorry my ignorance but what is ek ladki and where I can watch it? That’s how is written? Sorry if it’s not

Aw, you don’t need to apologize for that.

That is how you say it, Ek Ladki, which is the start of the rather long full title Ek Ladki Koh Dekha Toh Aisa Laga, a famous Bollywood song from the ‘90s and now a new Bollywood f/f movie. I wrote a bit about it here

It was just released in theaters on Feb 1st so there aren’t many ways to watch it online. You can look to see if theaters near you are showing it, they’d be subtitled, if not, wait with the rest of us until it’s out digitally. 🙂

god I followed you for juliantina but I’m indian so I can talk Bollywood as well!! I was so excited when I saw ek ladki ko… mentioned here. although personally I feel they aren’t going to do a good job of it. Is it bad I don’t want these baby steps but instead want them to dive into juliantina level love stories in Bollywood?

Lol, that’s the thing, I don’t want to carry my experience with one thing–a super rare thing–into something else. That’s just not fair on what’s being compared and, frankly, on me. If you set a standard that high, not much is going to meet it.

Baby steps are vital, as much as we really don’t see the need for them when things seem to be going well. Almost every time you have “I can’t believe ___ is happening”, yeah, there’s a good reason for that. Ultimately, it wasn’t really happening, or at least not very well. 

One part of me is definitely like why can’t these groups, Bollywood, Disney, JK Rowling, who have so much power and nothing to lose from being bolder, do something? But they don’t, and our frustration isn’t really hurting them, only us. 

Hopefully ELKDTAL will open doors and the next movie won’t be this…timid. 

In reference to your Ek Ladki post. I mean were we really expecting to have an all out wlw film? Hoping, yes. Expecting? We aren’t there yet unfortunately. Having a male driven film is another bag of marbles if we start talking about that in reference to South Asian culture and norms. It’s good to have expectations and be critical though. ELKDTAL is atleast a foot in the door of positive representation and subject matter.

Oh yeah, for sure, for sure. I just expected a bit more of them. 

Lol, I just deleted a whole para about what I would have wanted more of even within its environment. It is what it is, and what it is is something new and important. My hype is somewhat dampened but I’ll still try to see it as soon as I can.